Numb.

Thats how I felt today.

Imagine yourself standing in the middle of nowhere, a desert surrounds you, buildings, people, screams, thoughts, fears…all there at the same time, and all collapsing bit by bit.

And you keep standing still as if nothing affects you.

Its ugly. The world has become ugly and bitter that I’m not sure what we’re fighting for anymore.

You’d feel you want to be grateful for the blessings you have but can’t seem to be happy about it with all the cruelty in the world. When was it okay to brutally mistreat a child? Insult a mother? Belittle a father? Make fun of the less fortunate?

People seem to be craving fame and money that everyone is cheap all the sudden.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti-social nor bitter but this is my world, my home, my people…

The most difficult feeling in the world is “just standing there”, you can’t do anything, you watch where the world is going, you stand on the cliff that’s falling but it’s heavy to carry.

It all starts with denial. You deny the only truth you know. You never want things to go the way they go, but still hell with the truth! People want lies!

It often ends with disappointment; whether you planned it or not. It ends anyway.

The prayers you postpone, the people you ignore, the facts you hide and the life you throw away were never yours anyway.

As a matter of fact, you might spend your days solving problems and thinking of new ones, of new riddles to solve, puzzles to end, rules to break and lives to fake.

It starts and ends while you stare and stand and wonder what happened in between?!

We are in between!

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© Sandra Chami Kassis – sandrachamikassis.wordpress.com, 2014